Old Friend of Mine

Be fear of Allah and Allah is the Most Gracious and Most Merciful....

Life without boundary.. World is getting smaller... I would never think of finally meeting my old lost friend since i was in primary school or even since i was 8-year-old. Those hazy fade memories of mine with him as a friend do mean a lot. 

I was actually inspired by him in much of ways, I mean although i was just a kid back there.. but I do find someone that i can look up for... as my benchmark or something... And after he's gone, leaving the school.. I actually couldn't find any other person that can replace him. Never, even now. 

So, I grew up in my comfortable zone.. Don't have to struggle to be something or to be someone (although that is too much).. I never felt threaten with my surrounding accept for the fact that I am not an easy-going person (which I have to change the attitude). Although there are lots of great person around me, I never want them to be my standard... Sometimes, the way they treat me make me hate them even more (but that was totally wrong and against the Islamic attitude). 

But that was my past. Although I find difficulties in my social life, facing others, due to my inferiority out of nothing, I cannot pass thinking that I am better than anyone else at the same time. This mixed of feeling or interpretation of situations just make my emotion not stable. But I tried to be strong and most of the time I lost.

Many means I had tried to get rid of these inferiority and self-proclaimed attitudes but they often failed. Although sometimes it seems working but my main character (not easy-going) always interfere. I think it is not the methods that are flawed... it is me yes! Myself, who is the main obstacles in my road of changing. 

Well, my friend, knowing that you are still present and be part of my incomplete life, it does mean a lot to me... maybe to you i am just another old friend.. but for me you are Allah guidance to help me in my way of becoming a better man and slave. 

May this ukhuwwah is based upon love for Him and not on dunia only... I do hope that I could be someone like you... Not a copy of you but having the best qualities that you possessed... And of course, I know and always knew that both of us would share the greatest role model, the living Qur'an.. non other than our beloved Rasulullah p.b.u.h..... 

That's all till now. May Allah be with you...