Shaking
No one would want a shaking doctor to treat them. Especially a surgeon. To normal people, shaking when they hold something wasn't a big deal. It was only a minor shake. Nothing to be worried about.
Not for me. Being a medical student, it is essential for me to be in a fit condition in order to treat my future patients. However, this minor shaking has haunted me since my first year as a medical student. Since that, I started to doubt my ability to become a good doctor.
When I consulted to few of my colleagues and also seniors, they said it is normal. I was just nervous or anxious to handle the tools for the first time. By time, I will get used to them, and the shaking will disappear.
Those words comfort me a little bit. But that doesn't leave me not to do anything. For some people, skills aren't something acquired naturally or spontaneously. They need training. And I am one of those people.
First thing that I noticed regarding my condition is I shook because I did not believe in myself. I allowed doubt to enter my brain and that caused me to shake. So, I have to stop that. Starting right now, I have to believe in myself. Believe that I can do it.
But then, I wondered, why I was in doubt? Well, I have no problem cutting and slicing the chicken when I cooked for the first time. I didn't shake. What makes it different when handling medical tools? Then, I got my answer. When I was cooking, I handled a dead meat - literally. But in medicine, I attend a living patient hoping to be cured not otherwise.
So, that's my trigger. Afraid of harming my patient or make a mistake. As in medicine, there is no space for mistake. You can't play with lives.
Realizing the real cause of my problem, I see a lot of works have to be done to overcome my fear. To be a competent physician or even a surgeon.
The pathway towards greatness is not going to be easy. To be a good doctor, I need to work hard. There is no short cut. Everyone has their own fight in their way to achieve something. And as for me, this is my fight.
I have to stay strong and put myself together. I can't give up, not after all I have been through. I had seen changes in myself through these three years in medical school. And I see a hope for me. Don't worry, :).
And Allah saith:
" Yes! Whoever submits himself entirely to Allah and he is the doer of good (to others) he has his reward from his Lord, and there is no fear for him nor shall he grieve." (2: 112)
No one would want a shaking doctor to treat them. Especially a surgeon. To normal people, shaking when they hold something wasn't a big deal. It was only a minor shake. Nothing to be worried about.
Not for me. Being a medical student, it is essential for me to be in a fit condition in order to treat my future patients. However, this minor shaking has haunted me since my first year as a medical student. Since that, I started to doubt my ability to become a good doctor.
When I consulted to few of my colleagues and also seniors, they said it is normal. I was just nervous or anxious to handle the tools for the first time. By time, I will get used to them, and the shaking will disappear.
Those words comfort me a little bit. But that doesn't leave me not to do anything. For some people, skills aren't something acquired naturally or spontaneously. They need training. And I am one of those people.
First thing that I noticed regarding my condition is I shook because I did not believe in myself. I allowed doubt to enter my brain and that caused me to shake. So, I have to stop that. Starting right now, I have to believe in myself. Believe that I can do it.
But then, I wondered, why I was in doubt? Well, I have no problem cutting and slicing the chicken when I cooked for the first time. I didn't shake. What makes it different when handling medical tools? Then, I got my answer. When I was cooking, I handled a dead meat - literally. But in medicine, I attend a living patient hoping to be cured not otherwise.
So, that's my trigger. Afraid of harming my patient or make a mistake. As in medicine, there is no space for mistake. You can't play with lives.
Realizing the real cause of my problem, I see a lot of works have to be done to overcome my fear. To be a competent physician or even a surgeon.
The pathway towards greatness is not going to be easy. To be a good doctor, I need to work hard. There is no short cut. Everyone has their own fight in their way to achieve something. And as for me, this is my fight.
I have to stay strong and put myself together. I can't give up, not after all I have been through. I had seen changes in myself through these three years in medical school. And I see a hope for me. Don't worry, :).
And Allah saith:
" Yes! Whoever submits himself entirely to Allah and he is the doer of good (to others) he has his reward from his Lord, and there is no fear for him nor shall he grieve." (2: 112)
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